It Just Isnt There

I just don't know what to do
Why am I still in love with you?
I know you don't love me
And that's the way it should be
He loves you, and you love him
Funny to think that's the way we were
So much love used to be there
Then, somehow, it vanished into thin air

How can I get over you?
Then love other people too
I hurt so much
Just knowing we're so out of touch
It hurts to know you don't care for me
And it can't be the way it used to be
I want you back
But he has all the qualities you love and I lack
I hope you two are happy together
Since it can't be us....Together Forever.

Sigh*

Lost in his love

Your words of pain enter my heart,I can feel them,I can almost touch them,Yet I have no real magic,I can only give you my love,But love does not seem to be potent enough,Your wounds are too deep and painful,I enter them and try to find a resolution,There is none,I try to find some glimmer of hope,There is none,Your heart is ice cold,No fire can melt it away,At least for now,Please come back to me,Open your heart,Open your arms,Open your eyes once again,You are blinded by his love,You are fueled by his love,But where are you,I look into your eyes and a vast sea of emptiness floats before me,You have given yourself to him,You are so loss in love wit him.
and why?

Broken Heart

I will never forget the days we once had

The days when you were everything to me

My mind used to tell me we'd be together forever

But now I realize that was all a big dream

The feelings I have for you will never go

I wish I could take back that one regretful day

The day when I willingly let you slide from my arms

Never did I think of the astonishing pain of regrets

That I would once have to live through

The sight of you in someone else's arms

Makes my heart shatter into a million pieces

I sometimes wonder if you still think of me

Or if to you, I'm just a face in the crowd

I wish so very much that one day we can have it all back

But for now, I'll sit here silently

Remembering all the memories we once shared

Everyday my love grows much stronger

Hoping that one day you will feel the same

And put back the pieces of my broken heart.

Losing You Slowly

Everyday I regret pushing you away
Afraid that I might lose you forever
And that I might not get a second chance
If only I could turn back the clock
I'd tell you how much I care for you
How much I wish I could be with you
To hold you when you're feeling down
Or to hug you when you need a hug
But I'm afraid I've lost you forever
And I'll never get a second chance with you
Because u had fallen for him...
Now i am afraid that i am losing u slowly..

Now You're Gone

I'm relying on Fate
To take me away
To the place I know
I can always stay.
I'm not independant
Because I had you
Now you're gone
What do I do?
I can't close my eyes
Before I sleep
Because I'm scared
Of the tears I weap
I once held you close
Now I dont have you at all
I went so far!
We did it all!
We was like, perfection!
Nothing could take your place
My heart would only accept
The beauty of your face
But now you're gone,
I'm left nothing to do.
Apart from take my life
Because of you.
I dont want to do this,
I dont want to say goodbye.
But I will with courage,
And a tear in my eye.
Would you notice me gone?
Would you even care?
All I ever wanted to do
Is tell you I'd be there.
But you pushed me away
Down a long lonely road
And all of this..
Because I moaned.
I love you.
It wasn't ment to end this way
But now arrives fate,
And leads my life astray.

Wat more can i say..?

Mistakes are part of life. They teach us that some things shouldn't be done again or we should be tough and dont ever give up that easily, mistakes can also lead us to a lifetime suffering. I know this is true for because of my mistake, I lost you... If only promises could erase the past, I could open my heart enough to take you back. But we've been down this road time and time again and I've learned the hard way how the story always ends the truth always hurts??..Sometimes I wish I'm different and maybe unique? I wish I'm more than what I am right now. You know why? Cause maybe if that happens, the person I love will learn to like me, to care for me, to love me. I just wish you would...hmm I have come to realize that destiny can hurt a person as much as it can bless then I found myself wondering why out of all the people I could have loved, I had to fall for someone destined to be taken away from me by someone else..?

Haih...Blister blister and blister..

well...why am i so unlucky today?? my leg now got 3 blister liow ..haih..maybe jogging cuz de gua..haih..like my toe got hole oni..inside like got water de..lol..hmm...well today i think i jog the longest i jog 1 hour and 45 minutes...wa..quite tiring le didn noe that jog also can be so tired...but nvm for next year champion i will never giv up and i promise her le i will get first..hehe..another scary story when i jus finish jogging bac it was around 7.30 and the sky here was kinda dark..and i have too jog bac so far and the road lights are all spoil so the roads are like all black and i can oni hear my footsteps and see my shadow...damn scary...next time i will nvr jog till so late liow..makes me feels creppy..somemore nearby my house here got alot indo ppl..haih...

Nice haircut..?

hmmm...sunday i jus had my hair cut and monday i kena cut agn by teachers...****..my side soooo short liow they still cut...make me look like a japanese girl...= ="..now make my hair so short..haih...now i have to wait for another 2 more months for it to long agn...hmm so longgg!!!...and waste my another 20 bucks go cut my hair agn...****..hmm

Next year i am gonna win for yellow house running!!!

well..next year i am gonna get first in running for 100m, 200m, and also 400m for Yellow House..and hopefully i can be 'olahragawan"@@ did i spell it correctly?? ..hmm well i its quite easy just to say but i am starting my training now le...and i am gonna prove that i can..evendore my leg muscles hurt but i believe if i work hard i will succeed , bah kata melayu berbunyi" Sikit-sikit lama menjadi bukit" haha..hmm i think my toughest challengers are viveshen, kai sheng and wong kuang jin..haha wait for me u guys i am gonna beat u guys NEXT YEAR...and i will prove to U that we must have faith in ourself oni can succeed and dont easy give up so +u+u i believe that u can...



*last sentence is for someone special in my life,whom is very important to me and she is a part of my life, believe me u will succeed*

The other part of my heart needs U..

I don’t know why I keep on loving you despite the fact that I’ll get hurt again just like before. I never learn cause I don’t want to. Not now when I’m still strong to fall for you over and over again...and when I say I love you, please believe it’s true. When I say forever, know I’ll never leave you.. When I say goodbye, promise me you won’t cry. Cause the day I’ll be saying that would be the day I die...evendore my heart hurts badly but I don’t regret the rain or the nights I felt the pain or the tears I had to cry some of those times along the way. For every road I had to take ,every obstacles i had to face, every time my heart would break, it was just something I had to do to get me to you..if i giv u H-R-T? What would you add to these letters? EA or U? EA you get heart, U you get hurt. Now, what would you pick? Well, I would pick U because it’s better to get hurt than have a heart without U...twinkle twinkle little star i wish could be with her every night, watch her fall asleep and kiss her goodnight. When I get to heaven, I know just what to do. I’ll spend eternity watching over her...i had a dream and God asked me if I were to live again what would I be. I told him I want to be an angel to guide you. He said, “But you don’t have to guide another angel.” I then answered, “Well, I can love one.” ..hmm i hope that one day u will accept my love and let me stay by your side...

Truth hurts..haih..

Before, I asked God to give me someone special to love. I found you then lost you. I asked God why and He answered, “But my child, the one you asked for asked for somebody else..."I love you” doesn’t really mean that I want you to be mine. In fact, it’s another way of saying, “I’m happy to see you happy with someone new even if it’s killing me.” So I guess I love you...evendore i cant bear the pain but i would still say i love you..everynight jus before i go to sleep i would make a wish,Maybe the gods were sleeping when I asked for you. Maybe the angels were somewhere else when I wished for you. Cause if they only heard me praying and wishing so hard, he wouldn’t have you, I would...those wishes is it really not gonna come true? It’s hard not to love you, it’s hard not to care and it’s hard to live without you. But I have to try cause it’s harder to bear the pain of knowing you don’t feel the same towards me ...Once in my life, I met someone whom I loved and cared for. I gave everything, I fought for her. But one thing I forgot to do is to ask if she wanted me to but she told me that she didn love me at all...i have keeping this three words I wish to say to you, three words that might scare you away. Don’t you know those three words describe who you are to me in my life? But probably right now those three words that I wish to say are the same words you said to him...There are times that I’m about to give up cause there’s no way I can make you mine. But why is it that every time I’m ready to let go, I end up falling for you all over again?? why?For many times I said I wouldn’t love you anymore yet every time I lay my eyes on you, my heart starts to state these silent words, “I’m still not over you.”It’s okay if you can’t love me nor even think of me. I’m not asking you to. It’s really okay for me if you can’t cause you see? What I told you was “I love you” not “please love me too”..maybe one day u will find a guy u truly love...It’s unfair to think so much of you when you’re not missing me at all, to cry when you never shed a tear, to love when you say words that hurt my heart and to live when you breathe for someone else.

Lies

This lie's become a part of me
For months, I've played this game
Acting like it doesn't hurt
Each time I hear her name

Ignoring what's inside of me
Pretending I've moved on
As if the feelings I once had
For u are somehow gone

Those night all those messages
was it all jus a lie or true?
Thn all of sudden u seem to change
All those words that u use to say to me
U nvr said agn..
why?

Spending each and every day
With happiness and laughs
Forgetting all our memories
Avoiding photographs

But last night when I saw u
For the first time since u left
My heart stopped for a moment...
I couldn't catch my breath

When suddenly it hit me
As the tears started to flow
That even after all this time...
I just can't let u go ..

why am lying to myself? why cant i forget u?

i hope that u will find a more suitable person for you...